Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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