I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Randomize
