I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
