Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
