Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
