I hate your face
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
