Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
