I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I didn't shave. On purpose
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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