Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
