That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
