We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
