i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
