On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
