k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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