ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
