its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
