you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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