he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
