PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
