im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
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