oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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