Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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