She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
