I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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