Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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