When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
