he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You made out with two different species that night
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
