That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
