I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
