Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
