You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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