the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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