So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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