I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
