sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
