I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
