she was so not down for the gang bang
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
