And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize