I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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