ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
