Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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