Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
