belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I bet he comes in French.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
