I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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