Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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