On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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