Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
