just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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