Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
