My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
